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Wednesday, 1 December 2010

Snow Joke...


Okay, so there's plenty of snow about at Future; Nostalgic Towers, and the roads round here are like skating rinks...


It's winter, get over it!

Well I would, but...

I am moved this morning, watching the blizzard swirling outside my window, to have a bit of a moan about the snow. Well, not the snow exactly...

+++ Caution, snow rant ahead! +++

Our Skiing Correspondent ventured, at much risk to life and limb on the icy pavements, down to the local grit bin last night, only to be accosted by two of our erstwhile boys in blue (and just so you know, I have the utmost respect [usually] for our emergency services who do a very difficult job in often dangerous circumstances).

'What do you want the grit for?' they asked.

'I have two elderly neighbours who can't get out of their house because of the ice and snow, they haven't been out for a week, and I have a disabled family member who needs to make a hospital appointment. '

'Okay, but what do you want the grit for?'

'I'm going to clear my neighbours' paths* and put some grit down so they don't fall and hurt themselves if they have to go out. Then I'm going to dig our car out and put some grit down so my disabled family member can get to their next hospital appointment. You know, community spirit, like it says on the radio - look after the elderly and infirm...'

'Yes, but what do you want the grit...'

'Oh, go away!'

And they did! As soon as they'd gone, there followed a feeding frenzy around the grit bin. One old bloke said to Our Skiing Correspondent, 'I'm so pleased you did that. I wanted to, but was too frightened to say anything to them in case they arrested me.'

+++ Rant over. As you were. +++

* without having to be asked, I hasten to add.



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10 comments:

Cathy Webster (Olliffe) said...

Funny! What is WRONG with some people!!!!!! I am going to try "Go away" at the very next opportunity! Great snow rant, Sam!

Laura Eno said...

Good for her! How weird that they kept asking the question...I might have told them it made good breakfast food for the trolls. ;)

Sam said...

Cathy - Thanks! I know, you'd think that, under the circumstances they'd have been a bit more understanding, wouldn't you? To be fair, they were PCO's (Police Community Support Officers - civilians with some police training), and it's not lost on me that they're referred to as "NotaProperCopper" in these parts.

She only told them to "Go Away!" she says, because if she'd told them what she really thought they'd have arrested her. ;)

Laura - Hahaha! Well, there's a rumour they go around in pairs 'cos only one can read, only one can write! Presumably it's the same with questions.

Mari said...

How rude! Hey, Sam, why don't you send me some snow, so part of your problems will be solved? ;)

Laura, trolls like goats. (at least mine do ;P)

Sam said...

Mari - It would be my pleasure, how much snow would you like? We have plenty so I'll send you a couple of truckloads to be going on with. ;)

Deanna Schrayer said...

Isn't it amazing what wacky weather will do to people? Brings out the good in some, and the insanity in others!

ganymeder said...

OMG, I know it was aggravating, but your post was so funny. Please forgive me, but I could almost imagine it as a comic strip... with you slapping your palm to your head at the end because of their idiocy.

And blizzards aren't fun, but my son is just dying to get more snow so he can play in it outside! We'll take a little off your hands... :)

John Wiswell said...

How obnoxious. Good of you to put up with it, Sam, for all those folks around you.

Laura Eno said...

I have an award for you on my blog. :)
A Shift in Dimensions

Helen Ginger said...

You have the POWER. Who but one with the power could tell the police to go away and they do? I am impressed - by you, not the police. Maybe there were too cold to think straight.

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